The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

OK, by rights this is a ridiculous idea that should have me turning off my TV. But I’m the curious sort, and I do like anything non-Hollywood.

The Human Centipede (First Sequence, no less!) is from the Netherlands. But, the main character is German. The two girls are American. And the other guy is Japanese. So, you can’t say there’s no global appeal there…

The basic plot is of a mad German doctor/surgeon who is an expert with siamese twins, problem is… he’s flipped his lid and wants to take ordinary people and make them siamese, well three of them… to a centipede.

First things first, the German doctor/surgeon is as mad as a box of frogs and is brilliantly played by Dieter Laser. He IS your stereotypical mad Nazi surgeon, right down to the whip and jackboots, seriously. The victims do their jobs quite well considering that for most of the film the two girls mumble. Well, you would too if your mouth was stapled to someone’s ass.

You see, our mad German friend has already practiced on his own three rottweiler dogs and now wants to up the ante to humans. He abducts a truck driver, doesn’t think he’s suitable so bumps him off and buries him in the garden. Two dippy American chicks get lost while on holiday in the Fatherland and turn up the Dr’s house. After feeding them Alex’s secret potion, sorry I mean: Rohypnol, they are tied to beds. The good Dr acquires a new chap and he’s (luckily?) chosen to be the front of the centipede. So, as they lie there, tied to beds, the doctor does a fine slide presentation to them about how they’ll be joined from ass to mouth and when A is fed, the food will pass… well, I’m sure you can guess the rest.

The good Doctor and his human centipede. In this scene, he's going to teach the centipede to fetch his newspaper and bring it to him. No, seriously, he is... I'm not making it up, I SWEAR!

We really don’t see much in the way of gore in the film, but we do see the ‘subjects’ being prepared then as the centipede. But there are some sick SICK scenes in the movie.

Here he squeezes some puss from the facial wound of subject C - from this he determines that she is sick. NO SHIT Hitler!

In the snippet above, the Dr squeezes puss from the last persons wound, gives it a sniff, and determines that she is, in fact, sick. Possibly dying. Seeing puss squeezed from a stapled up wound even made me cringe. Eugh!

The scene where the guy in front decides he needs to take a dump is… well, psychological to the viewer. While the good Doctor dances with great glee at one section ‘feeding’ the other. Bizarre to say the least.

The special effects are basic, some face pieces to make it look like they’re stitched together, but most of the doctors handiwork is hidden by bandages. Probably for the best.

I really didn’t expect much from this film, but it delivered in spades. It’s a VERY dark horror comedy, with the comedy being provided by the comments made by the mad German doctor. We find them funny, but he’s quite serious about things.

If you want a film that’ll make you say ‘what the…’ several times, then this is the one. Definitely one I’d show to someone just to hear their comments on it.

Oh, and (according to IMDb) there will be a Human Centipede (Full Sequence) in 2011. I’m not sure how they’ll work it, but I’ll certainly be looking out for it!

Rating: ★★★½☆


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About Ronnie

Having survived the UK's 'video nasty' (prohibition) era I'm eager to catch up with all previously unseen sleaze and filth. I revel in mixtape oddness, boobage, gore, and proper latex special effects, don't get me started on CGI... - email Ronnie
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One Response to The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

  1. The Silent Stapler says:

    I enjoyed watching this movie. Some scenes were gross, but well balanced with the humour. But I don’t think I’ll be rushing to have another viewing haha

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