Encarnação do Demônio (aka: Embodiment of Evil)

Things what I learned from this movie:

• if you are a mad maniac in Brazil, they set you free after 40 years
• if you are a mad maniac with a crazy agenda, people will follow you
• if you are a mad maniac with followers, some of them will be hot chicks
• if you are a mad maniac with hot chicks you will want one of them to bear the fruit of your loins
• if you are a mad maniac with loony chick followers they will throw their naked selves at you

So, the story is as thus:

After forty years in prison, the evil gravedigger Josefel Zanatas a.k.a. Zé do Caixão is released by the lawyer Lucy Pontes in accordance with Brazilian Laws. He moves to the slums with his followers that worship him, and he seeks out the perfect woman to bear his children while haunted by the ghosts of his victims. The vigilante brothers Captain Osvaldo Pontes and his brother Coronel Claudiomiro from the Military Police chase Zé do Caixão in the slums to kill him and they find a track of tortured and mutilated bodies.
(from IMDb.com)

Initially the film started of pretty slow, it’s just Josefel (aka: Joe, aka: Coffin Joe) being released from prison/asylum and meeting up with Bruno his crippled man servant. Bruno takes Joe (who hasn’t seen the outside world for 40 years) to an abandoned old basement to meet his four new followers; two dudes and two hot chicks.

I should add that Joe looks kinda like Saddam Hussein, wearing a top hat, black cloak and with big fuck off finger nails.

Apparently those fingernails aren't stuck on, he did grow them that size!

Anyway, he’s now free and (just like old times) is looking for the perfect woman to have his successor. Only problem is that ol’ Joe is being haunted by his past, several victims from previous kills are appearing to him in visions. This is juxtaposed with the brutality of the Brazilian police who are shooting kids for sport. One thing leads to another and ol’ Joe ends up meeting two blind hags who just happen to have a hot as fuck daughter, which greatly interests him. He also has Bruno kidnap a hot scientist chick. God only knows how he manages it as Bruno can barely walk never mind kidnap. Anyway, Joe drugs her up and feeds her a slice from her own right buttock:

... and here's some doped up chick munching on a slice of her own right ass cheek. Mmm, lovely!

It’s from here the film gets to the good stuff. We also learn a bit more about Joe in that he had a wife/girlfriend who was pregnant with his son but it was not to be. We also see his potential future woman in a purification rite (or sorts) with her bare boobs, which was enjoyable. While Bruno is perving on this scene the cops bust him and kick the crap out of him. Unfortunately for the cops, Joe’s four followers attack and kidnap the four cops!

At the sight of four tortured cops I think Coffin Joe is about to become Cummin' Joe.

The cops are crucified, hung on hooks etc. All the usual nice ways to go. Meanwhile, another hot chick throws herself at ol’ Joe:

And he refuses her!! WTF?!

Coffin Joe dispatches the of the old blind chicks, tells the hot chick that he’s killed their aunts and asks what now. She replies:

On her forehead is a drop of blood from her one of her dead aunts. Does that stop her from fornicating with ol' Joe? NEVAR!

And so the madness continues. Various people are captured and tortured, one woman is smeared in melted cheese and has a rat wedged in her vag. No, seriously! Eventually the cops storm his hideout and all hell breaks loose. They find bodies everywhere, mostly male, as it seems that if you want female followers you just need to treat them like shit for a little while and they come round to your way of thinking. A bit like when has cuts open the sewn up  belly of a pig and out pops a woman. And apparently it’s a real pig and a real woman!

It’s a comical film which I think tries to show what it’s like in Brazil, but it’s a bit weird to try and mix the brutality of Brazil with the brutal madness of Coffin Joe!

There’s plenty of gore and blood. Certainly a lot of torture and there’s a TON of boobs!

Bit of a slow start, goes off on a few slow hallucinatory style scenes, but after the first kill it’s all good stuff!

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Even in death the chicks with neatly trimmed beavers want Joe!

And yes, she does ride his dead body...

Gotta love that tagline.

Dellamorte Dellamore (translated to Of Death Of Love, which can then be easily jumbled around to Love of the Dead) is a title better known to most American audiences as Cemetery Man.  Regardless of which title you prefer to adopt for it however, it is a film that is widely considered by horror aficionados as the last great Italian horror film, and in particular the last standout zombie picture in the long lineage of the countries contributions to the sub genre.  While Fulci and his peers were busy pushing the limits of on screen violence and nurturing the inherit apocalyptic nature of the dead coming back to life, writer/journalist/novelist Tiziano Sclavi was hard at work on what we might call a comic book series called Dylan Dog about an investigator who looked into nightmares.  As with anything that is held in even remotely high regard in print, it was loosely adapted for the silver screen.  While that history is certainly interesting, and may even give insight into the wildly surreal and dream like qualities of Cemetery Man, it isn’t vital to enjoying and thinking critically about the movie itself.  What is of utmost importance is the ability to just go with the quite jarring and constantly morphing flow of the picture, allowing yourself and your imagination to free associate the many clues and symbols embedded within the flick, and let your mind fill in the gaps that arise from its sordid and often misconstrued storytelling methods.

Our story is, at its base, one of a cemetery keeper who has not only the nasty chore of burying the recently deceased, but keeping them under the pounds of dirt he shovels on top of them.  See, Francesco Dellamorte (an ironic name that even the character pokes fun at in the very beginning of the film) battles zombies almost nightly, and with his trusty revolver and spade, and the assistance of his near mute helper Gnagi, he keeps the tenants of Buffalora cemetery within the gates by either shooting them in the head, or driving objects through their rotting skulls.  For a horror movie, this is more than enough to justify a standard 90 minute run time, but what makes Cemetery Man  so interesting and open to interpretation is that it is a film with films inside it.  There are love stories for both of our flawed and damaged reluctant heroes (Gnagi and Frances), there is a ingeniously deceptive detective story complete with twist, and then there is the ultimate question that plagues any intellectual viewer of this movie.  Where on Earth, or outside of Earth, is this all taking place?  Before I throw down my loose theories about the messages and mysteries contained within, let me first analyze it as a piece of  horror entertainment.

This is exactly how I open my door.

Cemetery Man leans heavily on the acting of its male lead Rupert Everett, which is a good thing considering he does a magnificent job conveying the many facets of Frances without the movie or the character ever coughing up any major information as to his personal history.  Besides mentioning that he doesn’t read much and never finished high school, we are instead treated to my personal favorite of all methods for establishing a characters motives, values, and even their beliefs.  The method is simply his actions.  His movements, the way he expresses his emotions and treats those close to him, and almost every other behavior all compiles together into giving us a better understanding of Frances, and if you take the plunge and see this movie (or watch it again, which I also highly recommend) you will learn that understanding Frances may be the key to understanding the film as a whole.  Outside of our enigmatic lead, Anna Falchi also graces the screen with her unique beauty, and brings some acting and modeling credentials to the multiple characters she plays, all of whom are cryptically named as “She” only.  She may not be the best actress, and at times it seems like either she is being subtly dubbed or having a hard time speaking perfect English (she is Italian after all), but for what her characters demand, it seemed fitting that someone who is beautiful, but not in a conventional sense, would play those parts.  In particular, I noticed that her eyes and eye make up changed for each of her 3 “shes” she plays, which may denote a change in the film itself, perhaps opening another chapter every time she reappears.  Gnagi, played by François Hadji-Lazaro, also lends a great deal of depth to the set of personalities on screen, and without hardly muttering any words, and not a full sentence until the very end of the picture, manages to serve as the loyal, but sometimes useless, compatriot to Frances.  He is there with him through thick and thin, and seems to serve as a reminder to Frances that even as along as he feels, he never truly is completely alone.  The rest of the supporting cast are all good, but they get nearly as much time and dialogue as these 3 do, which means that I don’t feel the need to elaborate on their fine performances.  But trust me, they are all well beyond adequate, and in the odd case there is someone you don’t particularly like, don’t worry, they will be dead soon enough.

Frances and "She" spending some quality time in the ossuary.

Michele Soavi (who directed another one of my favorite horror flicks of all time, Stagefright), with competent acting in hand, wastes no time in unraveling his surreal and morbid vision.  The pacing of the film is incredible, surrendering the typical pseudo-tension found in most horror flicks for an off-beat but blistering tempo that is always striking you with violence, sex, dark twisted comedy, or a combination of those 3.  Soavi comes off as a fan and student of the Italian Spaghetti horror films that dominated the underground and foreign markets for much of the 80′s, while at the same time balancing the tragic and dreamy mind fuck that is the narrative.  As I mentioned earlier, it seems like there is at least two movies being told at once, with the major determining factor between the two being the night and day cycle, as well as the lighting and the soundtrack changes.  Night time looks amazingly detailed, never suffering from “I can’t see SHIT” disease that I hate with a every fiber of my being.  Soavi also employs some clever POV shots, usually from the perspective of the dead or soon to be dead person in the scene.  It is used just enough to cement it as a legitimate tool in Soavis directing arsenal, but is done with enough restraint to not come off as a simple gimmick.  If you are a fan of European architecture with a Gothic flair to it, the scenes within the cemetery and surrounding area are sure to please you.  The film really shines during the night scenes more so than the day, and it reeks of a perfect unison between director, cinematographer, and photographer, who all seemed to understand how to make scenes not only look beautifully lit and well composed, but dark, eerie, and other worldly all at the same time.  This is without a doubt one of the most visually arresting horror movies I’ve ever seen, and maybe the best to date.

One of the clever POV shots in the film.

While it is commonplace in modern cinema to have sound effects and a inappropriately loud and obnoxious soundtrack or score dominant the dialogue of a film, it wasn’t so common even up through the mid 90′s.  The sound in Cemetery Man will probably sound dated to most, but then again you can say that the sound in JAWS is dated, in which my response to both is fuck you.  Gunshots are clear and sound as if they are being shot from a gun that has been shot many times before.  The soundtrack deliberately switches many times in order to extract or set a mood for a particular scene.  The dialogue also comes off fairly clean, although it could have been more crisp, but we will chalk that up to it not being a production that was not made on an astronomically large budget.  Whatever mild sins may have been committed by the available technology in the audio department are surely made up for by the special effects and visuals ten fold.  The blood and gore is incredibly visceral and strong, and Soavi shows confidence in his splatter man when he doesn’t jerk his camera away from head shots and other grisly images.  Speaking of which, this may be the movie with the most head shots I have ever personally seen, and each one looks more dynamite than the last.  Lighting, set design, filter choices, costumes and make up are all top notch and don’t feel dated or cheesy in the slightest.  If this movie were made in America, you would be able to spot the outdated attire and social wear from a mile away, but since this movie is a European production, the clothes have much more of a timeless and classic feel.  Same goes for the locations.  Beautiful architecture really helps set the stage, and the cemetery itself seems full of wondrous little alleys and coves begging to be explored.  It looks like the kind of movie you want to jump right into just to walk around and explore it.

Goodbye Boy Scout. Send the girls back with some cookies.

Cemetery Man is, or at least was for me, an answer to many wishes when it comes to my beloved zombie sub genre.  It is fast paced,never boring and it combines trippy, almost hallucinogenic visuals with classic elements of European horror film making.  It is unapologetic in its cryptic nature, which some have unfairly dubbed as simply confusing, and it is a startling example of how to try an add depth to something that could have existing solely on its surface values.  If you consider yourself a zombie film fan, or even a horror fan in general, and you haven’t seen this, you should do so immediately.  It belongs within every conversation about horror, especially if the conversation is about classics of the 90′s, and can even be looked at (as I do below, beware though it is full of spoilers) in an analytical sense if you are so inclined to try and figure out what is really happening.  Either way, don’t let this one sit there in your “Yeah, I’ll get around to it” pile.  You’ll learn to Love the Dead.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Fuck, that is an awesome giant puppet.

BONUS THEORIES!

Now onto my theories about the actual meaning and psychology behind the film.  If you haven’t yet watched it, I suggest you do at this point.  Cemetery man at first struck me as a story of a man in purgatory or hell, who is meant to learn about the differences between life and death (see his short talk with the death stature towards the end of the film for confirmation of this) or maybe even life itself while he himself rots in a cemetery where he must “re-kill” the undead.  The “She” character could easily be seen as the Devil, as every time she pops up, Frances sets himself back further from learning anything from his mistakes as he takes the bait on her “love” and pays dearly for it every time.  Outside of a religious context to the tale, there is also the possibility that Frances has a very vivid imagination, and that isolation, besides his friend Gnagi who could ALSO be seen as just an elaborate hallucination, has started to play tricks on his mind to the point where he truly believes the dead rise up from the ground and that it is his job to put down the “Returners” as he so eloquently puts it.  There is also the possibility that whenever night time comes along, what happens during the dark is a dream, and maybe he sleepwalks and acts out his dreams.  Of course, these are all just theories, each one having massive holes in them, and would welcome anyone to help me formulate an airtight meaning to this very cryptic gem I love so dearly and hold close to my horror loving heart.

END OF BULLSHIT THEORIES!

The Devil? Perhaps.

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Now playing: Nadja – Clinging To The Edge Of The Sky
via FoxyTunes

Laid To Rest

I was highly dubious about this film at first. A slasher flick, made in 2009? Surely it just wouldn’t work. The halcyon days of the slasher flick are safely in the past.

Well, I’m happy to announce that it does work!

The basic storyline of Laid To Rest is that a woman (later nicknamed ‘Princess’) wakes up, in a coffin, with a head wound which, we have to assume, has given her concussion resulting in her knowing nothing about how she got there, where she came from, or even her own name. What she does find out, rather quickly, is that a man, dressed in black, with a shoulder mounted camera and wearing a chrome, skull-shaped, mask is pursuing her.

Even the introductory credits serve a purpose, they show ‘Chrome Skull’ (as he’s affectionately known) preparing himself. I HATE films that do nothing during the intro, it’s a waste of five or ten minutes.

After escaping the coffin, and funeral home, she is picked up by a passer-by who taker her home (to meet his wife) and stay the night there, before taking her to the police. Unfortunately, for the mans wife, ol’ chrome face tracks them down and then comes one of the more inventive kills.

It may just look like your typical 'knife in the head' but it's how it's presented that makes it so much better...

Another couple of meddling folks are dispatched with by the time the man and woman (fleeing chrome-skull) meet the village nerd. He, in one of the films funny moments (for geeks like me) offers to email the police for the duo. Now a gang of three, they had for the local cop-shop. Unfortunately, Mr Chrome has been there first. Basically, chrome-skull wants ‘Princess’ back, probably to finish her off, but as the film draws to close, it ties up the loose ends of who the killer is, who Princess is, and so on.

Yes indeed, that IS a mans face being blown off by a shot-gun...

My only complaint with the movie is that we know very little about chrome-skull, or his motives. We end up knowing more about his victim (Princess) than him. Which is a bit of a shame, as I like my serial killers to have a bit of a background. Still there’s some good directing skills here with fast pacing giving some, potentially boring, kills a shock value.

Definitely a good slasher flick with several inventive, kills.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Have a looksy at the trailer:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6rtXAqfSa0