Midnightshowing.com Presents Alex’s Top 10 (+1) movies of 2009 (In no particular order except for the top 2!) from Alex S on Vimeo.

The only screencap I could give without spoiling the surprise!

Sometimes the children aren’t the only ones who get what they want for Christmas…

Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOqhqpBj5GE

You just know someone will make a zombie themed amusement park now.

For those who may have missed the internet hype machine for this flick, Zombieland is a zombie comedy (a Zombedy if you will) that mixes in some elements of the romantic comedy genre while telling the tale of a pair of polar opposite men who are doing the best they can to stay alive despite almost everyone else being undead.  Thin as it may sound, Zombieland manages to hit a fair amount of crisp, clean chords throughout its lean 88 minute run time and balances its humor, softer moments, and balls to the wall action set pieces well enough that the transitions between each never seems jarring.  Throw in a dynamite performance from one of Hollywood’s best kept secrets, none other than Woody Harrelson, and some really neat gags and gimmicks that put new spins on old mechanics of zombie cinema, and you have a flick that will have even the most cynical and jaded of genre fans cracking a smile.

I would give up a testicle to be half as cool as that man.

Zombieland’s greatest strengths come from unlikely sources, especially considering that the trailers and marketing used to promote the flick seemed to have won everyone over on first impressions alone.  The acting was the first aspect to jump out at me, quickly followed by a plot that, while without a definitive end, still managed to feel like it had a solid three act arc that moved alone at just the right pace.  Woody Harrelson is obviously the man in Zombieland, even though it’s up for debate as to whether or not he is the leading man or not.  The comedy swings back and forth from above-average to downright hysterical, but thankfully it never slips down to “Apatow, Will Ferrel and the rest of the people who have ruined comedy for the last 10 years” level.  It is relatively smart with some quick wit thrown in for good measure and it all flows very nicely, which is the core X factor to any good comedy.  The directing (handled by Ruben Fleischer in his first big mainstream directing gig) is swift and to the point.  His eye is always in the right place to catch all the action, and he doesn’t press to many buttons on the camera or fiddle with his images in post beyond adding some blood or the clever little “Rule” banners that pop in he film and pretty much explain how to survive the Zombie Apocalypse.  Across the board, all of my major concerns were really unfounded, and I was pleasantly surprised with how pleasant, professional, and refreshingly fun the whole movie felt.

Good rule dude!

For all my hemming and hawing, Zombieland has turned out, for me at least, to be one of the most enjoyable films of 2009 from top to bottom.  From the comedy, highlighted by a great cameo that doesn’t outstay it’s welcome, to the action (which could have used a touch more gore, but I understand it was not needed with the more lighthearted nature of the picture overall), to the more touching moments where the films raises a few interesting questions about humanity when it is faced with what amounts to its own extinction.  Zombieland is proof positive that big budget movies can tap into that indy spirit that drives movies like Dance of the Dead and Shaun of the Dead to become some well received cult classics with a fairly wide and timeless appeal.  Zombieland may not be the biggest and best roller-coaster in the park, but it’s the one your going to want to go on at least a few times and tell all your friends about.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Get 'em Woody.

A fantastic slice of years gone by when TV could be relied on to give us wonderful holiday treats like this one.  Well worth a watch and perfectly suited for both adults and children.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NqgidFIHw8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDpglhIhb5M

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLtGkyNGNuw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTNrH2-q_kY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aM0ejr2PFDU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnfs7qm2KdI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tj6rqnb-K1w

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNRYBpRjWJU

Didn't really help me out.

Satan’s little helper is a relatively new (2004 ) film that takes place on Halloween and looks to combine its own brand of irreverence and humor while working within the vague confines of a slasher picture.  The only problem is that it jumps around from idea to idea so much that the narrative becomes so muddled and disjointed the film is barely watchable a majority of the time.  Satan (who may actually be Satan or just a ruthless serial killer in disguise) is befriended by a young naive boy who is under the impression that his addictive video game, aptly titled Satan’s Little Helper, is something of a tutorial for how he should behave on Halloween.  Instead of going down the obvious path of a troubled and properly bullied young boy who uses his new monstrous friend to exact revenge, we get an hour and a half of scenes that all seem like they are ripped out of different movies with each of them just as out of place and incomprehensible as the last.  For all its tragic flaws, the spirit of the season and moments of pleasure do rise to the surface at times, but it feels more like an accident when this happens, instead of an intentional result.

If he was a pirate for Halloween, he wouldn't have this ninja problem.

Besides the plodding, meandering pace that drags everything about Satan’s Little Helper down, the acting is probably the number one culprit when pointing the finger of blame as to why this movie is, at times, completely insufferable.  Dougie, the little kid around which the story revolves is painfully annoying, and not in that charming, youthful way that countless other movies had gotten away with.  His big sister is also way to uneven and over the top and barely serves the basic of purpose of being the “attractive girl” in the movie.  The mother of those two children is just about the only one in the movie I didn’t want to see get run over by a truck, but that was more by default than anything.  Satan (see below) doesn’t speak at all, and his mime-like moves are novel at first, but quickly become just as awkward and played out as almost everything else the movie offers up by the 45 minute mark.  From a production standpoint, the film is more than serviceable with nice lighting and video quality, but that seems like a moot point when you factor in how little it does to elevate the watch-ability of this turdburger.  It is strange at times, and delightfully so, but just making a movie to be weird isn’t enough unless it has a traditional or time-tested narrative backbone to prop it up once the gimmicks wear off.  The villain is creepy enough, but seeing as how the highlights of any good slasher-esque film should be the eventual deaths, it is shocking to find that there are only something like 2 or 3 on screen deaths, and all of them are absolutely abysmal in quality, creativity, and execution.  I’m ok with some off screen and implied slayings, but when you do finally pull the trigger on showing us a murder, it should at least be mildly impressive, even if you have to copy the idea from another flick.

Satan has a sense of humor. Too bad this movie didn't.

It’s a shame that I decided to re-watch this film before I reviewed, because that is truly 95 minutes of my life I will never get back.  I have certainly seen worse films, and I reiterate the fact that there are moments where it all comes together for Satan’s Little helper and you see what could have been, but those moments are so few and far between that most won’t get to see them because they will be switching dvds to another, better film.  It doesn’t feel amateurish, or overly self-indulgent and self-important.  It just feels like a bad film that isn’t quite bad enough to be fun on a “this is so shitty it’s genius” level and it absolutely isn’t good enough to be recommendable to anyone but the bravest souls who want to say they have seen it all when it comes to Halloween framed pictures.  There just aren’t enough tricks up Satan’s sleeve to make this a treat, and there are times where I’d rather be biting into an apple with a razor blade in it instead of  sitting through the second and third acts.  You’ve been warned.

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

Oh, hey Jesus. Yeah I know, even you couldn't save this flick.

Majestic.

Tim Burton has had a rough decade.  He is under fire from both critics and fans alike for failing to hit a major cinematic home run since he gave birth to Big Fish which despite having Burton attached, still won over many as something of an “indie darling” motion picture.  Being a fan of Burton myself, I can’t quibble with those who have leveled their legitimate complaints since all of his films in the 00′s, including Big Fish, have failed to resonate with me on the level his work used to.  But to say that a handful of “meh” flicks have bludgeoned his legacy beyond recognition is more of a reflection of the poor memories of those decreeing it has.  Right before the turn on the century, and the turn of Burton’s luck, he cranked out what might be his most definitive and certainly most riveting and gimmick-less film to date.  Enter Sleepy Hollow.  A “remake” if you will of the 1921 picture bearing the same title, it is an onscreen adaptation of one of the most classic horror stories ever put to paper.  Burton’s penchant for Gothic romanticism and mature playfulness paired with his innate ability to both modernize and cherish his own unique brand of neo-classical Victorianism was, and still is, the perfect fit for such a grim and mystical tale.  With a cast that is as breathtakingly talented as it is ridiculously appropriate and a presentation that still has yet to be surpassed in it’s faithfulness to the period and atmosphere, Sleepy Hollow stands as one of best movies to indulge in around All Hollows Eve as well as one of the best examples of Burton not only as a clever niche director, but a phenomenal directing talent period.

Unmistakably Burton-esque.

The mere mention of Johnny Depp is more often enough acting cred to get most people interested in seeing a movie, but group him in with such widely recognized, and severely underrated in some circles, talent such as Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson, Jeffrey Jones, Michael Gambon, Christopher Walken and Christopher Lee and you have a recipe for a movie with a lot of intrigue from the cast list alone.  Hell, even Casper Van Dien is in this and proves his role in Starship Troopers wasn’t a complete fluke.  To go into detail about how everyone on screen is magnificent would be almost unfair to their work and to me as one man trying to encapsulate such performances in a concise set of sentences.  Depp is however, if there was any doubt, masterful as Ichabod Crane, and Ricci is the standout lady, just by a hair, as Katrina Van Tassel.  Walken plays The Headless Horseman in scenes where they establish his back story as a Hessian and for those short moments when he is doing his thing, he is as intimidating and magical as he was in Pulp Fiction when he stole the show with one monologue.  Speaking too much about what other talent plays whom, and to what degree of great their performances are would bring me be dangerously close to spoiler territory, and since this revamped and slightly reworked version of Sleepy Hollow brings a mammoth amount of depth and conspiracy to an otherwise fairly straight forward yarn, I dare not ruin any of the twists and turns that await if this is indeed your first trip to The Hollow.

Fun Fact: Walken actually didn't need ANY make-up for his scenes.

Burton’s job directing Sleepy Hollow mus have been quite a pleasurable task by my estimation though.  Surrounded by some of the most professional and well-known actors and actresses in the business, both circa 1999 and in present day, Burton and his cohorts probably had an easy time focusing on getting the mood, tone, and atmosphere just right for a film that, at its very soul, is a period piece taking place in the autumn of 1799.  With longtime friend and brilliant musician and composer Danny Elfman at the helm of the soundscapes, Burton really managed to capture both the historical themes and architecture quite well, while still leaving room for putting his trademark style into every nook and cranny he could find without spoiling the richness and charm the period brings itself.  On a more intellectual level, there is even an undertone running through the film which presents some interesting viewpoints and debates about science vs. the supernatural.  For those who are uninterested or unimpressed with this kind of depth can take solace in knowing that it only pops up intermittently, but never the less impressively.  Getting back to what is on screen and not simply implied or inferred, the sets, lighting, the brisk and fun pace, and the score (which I believe is one of Elfman’s absolute best) all work in harmony to really bring the fusion of history and vivid imagination alive without becoming overbearingly childish or shallow.  Burton does use some of his classic tricks like angled shots and shadow/silhouette play, but he keeps his flashier side well restrained, and instead lets the locations, mood, and dynamite atmosphere do a bulk of the talking while he frames and observes it all without much visual interference.  Oh, and there is quite a copious amount of gore in this one as well, mainly be-headings with a few “surprise” kills I wouldn’t dare ruin.

How about a little steampunk with your Burton?

For those who have lost faith in Burton and possibly skipped out on his rendition of Sleepy Hollow due to his recent missteps or just never being overly thrilled with his late 80′s/early 90′s work (Batman, Beetlejuice, Nightmare before Christmas), you are seriously missing out on one of his most complete and well conceived pieces of work.  Burton and crew aren’t just sitting on their hands and relying on their laurels, reputation, and charm to win people over.  They have managed to fuse a strange sort of modernity and timely relevance to the yarn while still putting forth a picture that is phenomenally fun and can be enjoyed completely on the surface without missing out on major pieces of the puzzle.  Consider this a autumnal gem that isn’t strictly to be used around my favorite holiday, but at any time in which you feel the need for spooky tale that is handled by a crew that was, and hopefully will be again soon, utterly on top of their game.

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

A Beetlejuice dress! YES!

Woman just got deadlier, if that's even possible.

Jake West is quickly becoming one of my favorite British” horrody” directors (that’s a word I made up for horror comedies, do you think it will stick?).  My love affair began when I saw Evil Aliens (review forthcoming) and has now been cemented by his latest offering Doghouse.  Where Evil Aliens was a splatterific sci-fi horror mash-up that simultaneously payed homage to and poked fun at a dozen or so movie conventions we all know, love, and loathe, Doghouse sees West moving in on profound territory, the same way that Shaun of the Dead saw Frost, Pegg, Wright mature in their ability to both stir up nostalgia and unbridled fun while coating their narrative with a unique sentiment about the nature of companionship, both friendly and romantic.  West takes a more controversial approach however, borrowing some notions about the bonds that are shared between a group of 20 something guys, while pitting them against a village mostly populated by women that have been the test site for a particularly sexist government experiment that turns women in rabid cannibal zombie-types who crave the flesh of men only.  Finally, a horror film without a “Final Girl.”

Sorry guys, she's married.

If you didn’t catch all that, allow to recap briefly the synopsis of our fair tale.  A group of guys, who are generally at odds and different stages with the opposite sex, plan a trip to a village out in the boonies to help a friend overcome his recent divorce.  When they arrive, the quiet village is all too quiet, and they soon realize that just about every man is dead, the military was recently present in the area, and all women have turned in fem-zombies who have a single item on their menu…men.  It is here where West takes his first stand by managing to avoid the obvious misogynist jokes and tendencies by giving our squad of males many quirks and shortcomings which make their battle with the mutated lady things all the more interesting, and more importantly, hilarious.  There’s a comic book store owner/nerd who sees this as an opportunity to live out an Evil Dead like fantasy about locking wits and weapons with the undead.  There is a chauvinist who truly believes he is the universe’s gift to women, while all indicators point to the opposite, and so on.  They are all introduced quickly in the opening montage, which shows in just a few seconds what type of guy they are.  Once the stage is set, and we are all properly introduced to the players, the real fun begins.  West not only has a wonderfully talented cast to direct (the acting is grade A, much much better than even I was expecting, and I already had high hopes for this one), but also a gauntlet of obstacles for them to overcome which lends itself nicely to some ingenuity as far as weapon choice and creation and some very intricate situational humor.  I won’t go into detail here about the ways they navigate through the village while avoiding detection and certain doom, but rest assured you will get a few chuckles at the very least.  The acting is prime, and the pacing is never dull, but if I have to level one legitimate complaint about Doghouse, it would be that the final few frames leave a little too much to the imagination of the viewer.  It doesn’t ruin the film, especially since Doghouse isn’t a horror movie that is fixated on the finish line, it is instead all about the ride their and how fun that is, but a greater sense of absolute closure or…non-closure wouldn’t have been out of place for such a definite, grounded film.  Still, that’s trying to find things to nitpick in an otherwise vast sea of general praise.

You're supposed to hang the clothes up to dry after the person takes them off. Silly zombie women.

Besides being a fan of the interplay of horror and comedy (and being one of the recent masters of the trade), Jake West is also a guru of gore.  Specifically, how to use gore as both a visceral intensifier of violence and slapstick style humor gags.  There are times in Doghouse where the weak-stomached might go “EWWW” at a scene, only to turn around and laugh hysterically at another kill that is played off more like a joke.  West really juggles this well, flip-flopping between the more light-hearted moments and the downbeat serious ones.  His eye for angles and camerawork never gets in the way either, and his flashiest moments are in the first 10 or so minutes, when he plays with filters and stop screens for a while, before settling into observer mode without much interference in the form of trying to being overly fancy or stylish.  The lightning, which looks mostly natural during the daytime and not overpowering at night helps to give the overall production value the sleek, slick, and professional look this film has from start to finish.  As far as audio, I didn’t pay much attention to the score, but when it popped to the foreground, it never felt out of place, which is always a plus.  Cars, decapitations, golf clubs and the like all pack an appropriate wallop and voices are crystal clear, which is a major benefit seeing as how almost all the humor is embedded deep within snappy conversations.  And finally, the gore is great while not being quite copious as I thought it was going to be.  When it hits though, it lands with KO force.

You know exactly where this is going, and yes it's fucking hilarious. TAKE THAT YOU OLD BITTY!

Jake West has crafted himself yet another winner, and the first real return to form for him since Evil Aliens.  The British setting and cadence helps to give this twisted yarn about the war of sexes some much-needed levity and class, something that would have been rather unobtainable on my side of the pond.  West is showing every sign of becoming a more dangerous director in the horror ranks, and Doghouse shows that he has incorporated more lofty ideals and concepts into his already exemplary understanding of the very core values and mechanics of our beloved genre.  He can make you laugh, squirm a bit, and now he is even showing that he can even make you think for a second or two.  Leave the lady friend out when you watch this one (who am I kidding, no one who writes for Midnight Showing or reads this drivel has a damn girlfriend).

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

The roaming gnome is a MURDERER.

Ooooo, shiny axe.

How to be a Serial Killer is the next logical step in the general media’s new found, and surprisingly open, love affair with habitual murderers.  From the raging success of TV shows like Dexter, the disturbingly widespread fandom of both the cinematic and book versions of American Psycho, to the almost decade long dominance of the SAW films, we as a collective unconscious are showing some complex, yet favorable, emotions towards people who commit the act most of us could only dream of.  Whether we are sucked in by our inherent voyeuristic human tendencies or by our desire to live vicariously through those characters who can turn fantasy into cold, hard, and very final reality, there is no doubt that the business of death is, at the very least, profitable if done in an interesting way.  How to be a Serial Killer (referred to as How To… from now on) taps into many of the principles and ideas that have proceeded it by those movies and others, while putting an educational and humorous spin on the etiquette and intricacies that serial killers face when applying their trade.

A snapshot of the seminar Mike Wilson leads that is interwoven into the film.

Instead of trying to spend its 90 minutes run time generating sympathy and compassion for our lead, the enigmatic and confident Mike Wilson, How To… leans on a darkly humorous exploration and examination of the morals, patterns, and rules that any good serial killer should follow into order to be the best that he or she can and, of course, not get caught.  Mike (played with uncanny magnetism by Dameon Clarke) is adamant about respecting those who are less fortunate than you (played out with a scene involving a homeless man), the importance of never involving children, never stooping to becoming a rapist or thief who also just happens to kill their victims, and so on.  Of course, without conflict we would have no movie, but I’ll allow you to experience for yourself how breaking any of these guidelines is the on ramp for a quick decent into trouble with the law.  Our story is anchored by Mike’s willingness to share his knowledge and experience with those who currently hate their life, and are usually subject to be stomped all over by society in general. Mike takes a video store clerk (Bart, played by Matthew Gray Gubler, who looks EVERY bit the part) under his wing as an apprentice, and begins to mold him into a stronger individual, albeit through murders which Mike commits.  It is at this point where the films begins to resemble a quest for personal identity, and even a coming of age tale, more than a horror, crime, and comedy mash-up.  Mike turns this anxious, failure-prone loser of a man into someone who resembles a human with a modicum of dedication and confidence within himself.  See, what I found to be the glue that holds this otherwise very risky and pseudo-experimental film together, is that I don’t think this is a movie about serial killers in the slightest.  Much like “Signs” (Yeah, I know everyone hates that movie now, but give me a minute to explain the comparison) was a a movie about personal grief and general faith (in and out of religious context), How To… is more like a buddy comedy where someone who knows his end is, most likely, inevitable decides to impart wisdom onto to someone less fortunate who may never have a chance to fulfill a dream, let alone just feel some kind of true companionship or being wanted and needed.  Normally, those kind of films are predictable and rather sappy, and written off (and rightfully so).  How To… takes that sentiment, and fuses it with a pitch black sense of what is funny, all while gleefully prancing around in a world that should certainly stay in make believe land.  The fictional realm where movies exist is what makes a flick like this work so well because if you can separate the messages it has to offer from the slayings it depicts ,you actually get a movie that works on two levels that couldn’t be more opposite.

In just 10 EASY steps!!!

Stepping outside of the headier discussion about the weighty concepts that How To… seems to sneak in under the radar, this is a film that looks, sounds, and plays like something with a much larger budget than I suspect it had to work with.  As I mentioned before, Dameon Clarke doesn’t steal the show, he IS the show.  The segues which shows a cross between an infomercial and a seminar are brilliant and captivating in their style, presentations, and brevity.  When they are finished book ending the chapters of the main narrative, the story itself does a more than commendable job of never dragging its feet by resting on the movies quirky and quaint vibe that is sure to win most over within the first act.  The third act, if there is something to nitpick, feels a bit uneven, and at a particular moment, very out of sync with the rest of the film.  This lasts for only a few jarring minutes however, before the films snaps firmly back into place with a tidy little epilogue piece that puts a pleasantly disturbing spin on the overarching motive of Mike Wilson.  Director and writer Luke Ricci deserves a pat on the back for both eyeing a good looking picture that uses a lot of natural lighting to give a real world feel and scripting a piece that teeters, dangerously at times, between comically subversive and intriguingly maniacal.  Ricci easily could have lost his grip on the tale and let it slip into either amateur hell or”been there, done that” land, but he sticks to his guns and sees the vision through, for better or worse.  Technically speaking, it is a very solid package, but the real measuring stick for something as out there as How To… will really be how it resonates with each individual viewer.  Chances are, you may see something very different that I did.

Disposing of bodies is hard work. That's how I keepy my abs in such good shape.

How To… earns a classification as “daring”, if nothing else.  While you can soak this in just focusing on what is at the surface, it is my belief that you should try to look a bit deeper to find what makes this picture just a bit different, and maybe even a touch special.  I’ve said it before and I will pound that drum again.  In a day and age where nigh everything is a remake of an older film, a foreign film, based off a book even though the movie has nothing to do with it except ripping the title, or a copycat, it’s a treat when a movie comes along that isn’t trying as hard to be the next big thing as it is trying to make changes to the formulas and see if something magical comes out.  Passing the final verdict on whether or not How To… has what it takes to create waves of transformation in the genre is a test only time can administer.  As far as being a slightly radical departure from the trite and predictable that also happens to be fairly entertaining, I can attest to How to be a Serial being just that.

Rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars

Meet Sam.

The wait is finally over.  Trick ‘r Treat, hyped since early ’07 (and to my knowledge, even a bit before that) to the next big thing is seasonally anchored horror cinema, is an anthology horror film that takes viewers on a blissfully entertaining and brisk jaunt through Warren Valley, Ohio where Halloween is one of the busiest and most prepared for nights on the calender.  Intertwining 5 or so stories, all seen from different perspectives, Trick ‘r Treat is a mash up of some iconic horror creatures and staples, all while never breaking from its perfect pacing by having to give us narrator scenes that wrap up the last story and introduce the next.  The only indicator that a new tale has begun is if we get a EC comic book style overlay on an establishing shot that says “earlier…”  Director and writer Michael Dougherty has crafted himself a borderline masterpiece worthy of a place right next to John Carpenter’s Halloween, and Tim Burton’s Sleepy Hollow and A Nightmare Before Christmas as one the most atmospheric, jubilant, and synonymous-with-the-season movies I’ve ever had the privilege of laying my prying little eyes on.

Just think of the clean up on November 1st.

There is so much to like about Trick ‘R Treat, I find myself at a slight loss where to begin.  The flick gets off to a rollicking, with a classic, tension building stalk-and-maybe kill sequence that, in a short 5 minutes, sets the tone and pace for the 80 minutes of pure joy that follows.  The atmosphere, highlighted by wonderful work with fog, night-time lighting, and a creepy little score that shows influences, but not outright robbery, of some time tested winners like Psycho and Halloween.  Be mindful that while there are some absolutely terrific shit-your-pants jump scares, Trick ‘R Treat isn’t about, nor is it trying to be, the scariest film on the block.  Quite the contrary, it is trying and succeeds in being a celebration of the undertones and concepts that Halloween was founded on, and a exploration of how it has been bastardized today.  It is, at its core, a series of tales about respect, torwards one another and the dead and of rightful comeuppance, all coated in that notion that even though we get older, and stop believing in the spooky, supernatural, and things that go bump in the night, there is always a little flicker of doubt that lingers in the back of your brain like a piece of bubblegum stuck to your shoe.  You just never know if all those anecdotes are completely full of shit, or frighteningly based on fragments of truth that could, literally, come back to haunt you.  Dougherty and his lens are very rarely ever overly pompous or experimental, but you can truly feel as if the man is really in his element here, as if he was filming and photographing a long lost lover.  The colors just scream Halloween, with every pumpkin and shade of orange popping out at you while the sets and locations (the rock quarry in particular looks stunning) look as dreary and macabre as they allow themselves to be.  Tasteful and slick scene transitions and zero abuse of worthless establishing shots keep us hopping from story to story like a youth frolicking from house to house in search of their favorite candy.  Despite the stories overlapping in some spots or being left alone only to be wrapped up later on, Dougherty manages to keep his plot line juggling smooth and easy to understand.  There are red herrings everywhere, and some of the twists that Dougherty has come up with, both in accordance to the herrings and not, are nothing short of brilliant.  You will have at least one “I totally should of seen that coming and now I feel like a jackass” moment, if not 2 or 3.

The Michael Myers head tilt. Genius little nod to the past.

Brian Cox and Anna Paquin are the big name talent in here, and while I still am not very fond of Paquin, I have to say she does fine in her role,  but brings nothing to it a dozen other actress’s couldn’t have.  Brian Cox however, does everything in his power to steal the entire movie in his segment, and stands out as the cream of the crop in a movie full of actors who not only don’t annoy us (unless they are supposed, like that bitch Macy), but don’t disappoint either.  Besides some quality acting to help make us believe, a good fright flick also needs at least a grain of solid effect work, and without spoiling any of the surprises (any gore scenes or kills or…things I mention would be directly spoiling one of the stories, if not the whole film) the blood, creature work, and gore is all top notch and almost entirely practical.  No CGI garbage here folks, rejoice!  As you have probably guessed from the picture above, the film has thrown in some homages and references to past flicks, which include but are not limited to The Thing (the famous “You gotta be fucking kidding me” line is used to great effect), Evil Dead II (The “Hand” dilemma), and of course, the original Halloween (THE head tilt).  Rest assured though, Trick ‘R Treat doesn’t sit on its hands and hope that some nice blood, make-up, and nods to more famous films will get it through.  There is a fair amount of substance for something that is this short and moves this quickly.  To say anymore, would be to do grave injustice to those of you who haven’t seen it yet, and if you haven’t gotten the hint yet, any fan of anthology, horror, or just the holiday itself needs to see this, pronto.

One very busy child when the holiday rolls around.

After the 2+ year tease, Trick ‘R treat has finally arrived, and I hope it makes even half the impression on a larger audience that it made on me.  Obviously, movies like this have a smaller, more definitive window of when they can be sold effectively and watched, but that doesn’t make it any less of a great little flick.  It has independent blood running through its veins with an outer shell that just oozes passion-filled, high-end production values.  Iconic themes and ideas are revisited in interesting and new ways, and even some new rules and laws are implied which are sure to stick with anyone who loves having a film add a new layer of lore to the most grim of publicly celebrated holidays.  If you are looking for a more recent way to kick-off the season, you can do no better than Trick ‘R Treat.  Just don’t blow out your candles before midnight…traditions are not made to be broken.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Gotta love that turn of the century style horror box art.

Mike Mendez is one of my favorite film makers, which is a labor of love considering he has only directed 3 true horror films all by himself, and I have to keep checking back on his myspace and imdb waiting for him to pump out something new.  He was responsible for The Gravedancers, which was featured in the first “8 films to die for” horror festival that is still continuing on today.  He also directed Killers, which was a bit of an art house/experimental horror by way of tarantino-esque crime thriller.  While Gravedancers was quite a scary and tense little ghost film, and Killers was strange, surreal and interesting in its own right, his real winner, in my eyes, was a little independent horror film released in 2000 called The Convent.  Mix equal part Night of the Demons 1 and 2 (reviewed by yours truly here and here) with DEMONS, an Italian zombie and demon possession movie, and you have a good foundation for gaining appreciation for what The Convent is all about.  A rag tag bunch of college types go to a much hyped building that was once home to a all girl boarding school run by nun which was the stage for a mass murder by a former student via shotgun and fire, run into a bunch of goth kids looking to summon something from “below” in the same building, and we all benefit from watching the carnage that ensues.  I feel compelled to defend The Convent, since it is one of my all-time favorite “I could watch this at anytime, any day and enjoy it” type films.  It certainly falls into the ever fluctuating cinematic category of “so bad it’s good” or simply “bad-good” for short.  The whole movie has its tongue firmly planted in its cheek, but it is also a tribute to how enjoyable something that is extolling the virtues of a particular genre and time frame of films (teens dying thanks to supernatural happenings and the mid to late 80′s) while still having merit all of its own.  It survives on more than just its nostalgia.  There is almost…dare I say…an art to making a flick that should be (even by the own directors admission) buried and forgotten into a lower-than-cult-level gem that I, and many others on the internet who are scattered about randomly, just can’t get enough of.  That, or maybe I am just a really weird person.  I’ll let you pick which choice you like better.

Looks like someone did all the legwork for me already. Nice.

Besides saying that Convent is merely “fun” or “funny”, one of the best parts about it is how little time it wastes.  It’s like a song with a really good chorus, in fact a great chorus, that just decided to shorten up the verses to about…10-15 seconds in length.  It doesn’t make you “wait for it”, or try to build up suspense or intrigue where there is none to be had.  It is just 70 some-odd minutes (not including the credits)  of payoff after payoff which include nods to Lucio Fulci’s Zombie, and as I mentioned earlier, Night of the Demons and Umberto Bava’s DEMONS.  The humor is definitely subjective, and the impact of many of the lines will directly correlate to how many horror films you have seen and what your idea of good humor is, but even the mis-delivery of some of the more benign lines make me chuckle during every viewing.  The show stealer is certainly Megahn Perry, who gives one of the best “goth girls with all the knowledge of the spooky place the group shouldn’t be breaking into” performances in recent memory.  Closely behind her is Dickie-Boy and Saul, the fumbling, embarrassingly pathetic and pretentious summoners who, by pure accident, actually succeed in turning the abandoned boarding school into a maze of zombie demons and untimely death.  The wacky accents, mannerisms and behaviors they perform will make any outcast from high school watching this cringe with how close to home it hits, since we all either were or knew someone who was only a few good acting and improv classes away from being one of those two characters.  Often times, pointing out the weak link or links in a low-budget horror movie is about the easiest thing to do, but The Convent actually doesn’t have anyone in it who just makes you want to go grab a drink when he or she on screen.  They aren’t exactly the deepest or most empathetic cast of folks ever assembled as far as their characters go, but they don’t need to be.  It would be like watching a rap video and complaining because they are objectifying women.  They all serve there purpose admirably and more importantly fit the roles they are playing.  It’s a win-win.

Douchebags getting out of a jeep. I think we all know where this is headed.

Mendez stretches the minuscule budget to give us more bang for the buck than almost any of the major studios horror contributions this decade.  We get some great looking gore and fantastic kills, which flip-flop between homages to famous gore scenes (like the eye scene from Zombie) and original creations (like a the cheerleader face rip complete with zombie cheers and dance moves).  We also get some really throw back style glowing green eye contacts, black-light trickery, and flourescent blood that makes for great plasma splashes and squib explosions.  The directing is pretty much in observer mode, which is fine and dandy to me considering I like when a horror movie lets the action in front of us do a majority of the talking without to much in the way of distractions from flashy or overly stylish and pretentious camera work.  There are some “Evil Dead” style reverse shots, especially right when the malevolent spirits arrive for the first time, but it’s quick and all in good taste and doesn’t come off as a detriment.  The demons also have this crazy stutter step walk that they do, which can be played for laughs as well as creep factor, and works both ways depending on how you want to see it.  The soundtrack, featuring a cover of “Dreamweaver” and “You don’t own me” works well hand in hand with the intentionally cheesy and bombastic score that only strengthens the good time vibe that runs through the whole picture.  There’s a few exterior cgi scenes are laugh out loud bad, but seeing as how bad they are, I like to see them as jokes instead of budget restrictions.  The editing is quick, and almost ferocious at times, as the movie speeds by at its gloriously rapid pace.  I am a firm believer in the idea that only a handful of movies ever made should top a 90 minute run time, and The Convent has shown me that almost every horror film should run about 85 minutes, including the credits.  There’s a lot to like here, visually and aurally, if you’re a big fan of more modern takes on proven old school formulas.

Give me this over cgi any day of the week, twice on Sundays.

The Convent has drugs, stereotypes, demons, huge laughs (both intentional and unintentional), a likable cast of actors, Adrienne Barbeau (Swamp Thing, Escape from New York, The Fog), Bill Moseley (Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, House of 1000 corpses, The Devils Rejects), and ever a cameo from timeless rap artist COOLIO.  If that isn’t enough to entice you, then I am clearly out of touch with what passes for great, shameless, unabashed, old school throwback blood and guts movies.  As a sidenote, the dvd for this flick has not one, but two commentary tracks, both of which are hysterical as they basically rip their own film apart.  There is also a “gore on demand” feature which gives you a random kill scene for your viewing pleasure.  It’s like it was made just for me.  Get possessed today.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Hey Ronnie, our dates have arrived!

—————-
Now playing: Foo Fighters / Monkey Wrench
via FoxyTunes