Frontier(s) – Unrated Director’s Cut (2007)

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buy canibus Lyrical law Just watching the trailer makes me really want to watch this movie.  Gore? Check.  Nazis? Check.  Blades to an Achilles Tendon? Check Check Check.

This is a French movie, which I watched with English subtitles.

So, let’s begin.

Let me start out by saying that the gore in the movie is spot on.  The blood looks like blood should look like.  +1 just for that.  I watch a lot of movies and shows just to see how well the makeup artist do.  They were amazing in this movie.

The plot of the movie (if a horror flick can actually have a plot) is that a über right-wing government was just elected in Paris, and riots broke out because of it.  In my honest opinion, if the people who were rioting would have put as much energy into campaigning and voting as they did rioting, the right-wingers would have never won.  But this kind of thinking does not make movies.

So, Yasmine, a 3-month pregnant French chick, and her 4 manly cohorts, decide to make best of a rioty situation and loot over 125,000 Euros from somewhere, and the cops are chasing them.  Her brother gets shot, and it is dying wish that she keep her baby, who’s father is one of the other manly cohorts, although they are no longer dating and he doesn’t give two shits about her or the baby growing inside her.  You have to love baby drama in a horror movie as if that is going to make the plot any stronger.

So the four young Frenchies take off on a road trip to Amsterdam, Holland, in what I like to believe is going to become a drug fueled heaven for the four of them.  The movie never explains this, so I feel like I need to close some plot holes for you.  So, they are off to Holland in search of Nirvana via legal hallucinogens in two different cars.  The two guys in the first car get tired and stop at a hostel near Luxembourg stating, “this place always has rooms”, as if they had stayed there before many times.  They get a room, and some action via the “whores” at the front counter.  This is implied action, as they don’t show it on screen. -1 for no sex scene.  Yasmine calls them to see where they are and they give her the address.  Then the guys make a big mistake at the Hostel Family Dinner, and call the girls whores in front of their mean neo-Nazi brothers.  Yay!  Time for blood!  The Nazi brothers beat the crap out of the two cohorts.  The cohorts get away, get in the car and drive away.  A Nazi chases them in his classic Nazi Germany square box SUV, and runs them off the road and into a mine pit.

Meanwhile, at the Hostel, Yasmine and her Baby-Daddy show up inquiring as to the whereabouts of their cohorts.  “They are at the Cottage.  I can take you there.”

The Cottage is where the rest of the movie takes place. I don’t want to give anything else away, I mean, why watch the movie if you can read it in my review?  There is a lot of blood, hard punches, not one, but TWO Achilles Tendon cuttings, “children” scaring people, a rotary saw which can only mean foreshadowing – gory foreshadowing, a human meat house, pigs, and one hell of a great twist near the end of the movie.

My faveorite comments I made during the movie were “I know I am covered in pig shit, but I am totally going to make out with you” and “I know I am covered in blood, and you are dead, but I am totally going to make out with you.”

Oh!  And I almost forgot.  Remember this image from the trailer?

How do I always end up naked and chained to a bed?

You totally, finally, get to see ONE SIDE BOOB!!!!!

I highly recommend watching this movie.  This is the 2nd or 3rd French horror movie I have seen recently and I think the French do an awesome job at it.

Kukmor Rating: ★★★★☆

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About Brandy Candy

I have always loved movies. I saw the first two Star Wars at a Drive-In theatre in Chicago, Illinois, USA. My parents would put us five kids in our pjs, pop a paper grocery bag full of popcorn, and then put us on top of the station wagon to watch the films. When we moved to Raleigh, North Carolina, USA in 1979 we were sad to find that there were no Drive-Ins here, just indoor theatres. When the Muppet Movie first came on TV was when we finally got our first color TV. Movies have always been a huge part of my life. I fell in love with horror movies at a very early age. Gremlins, Ghoulies, Pieces, I Spit On Your Grave – the list can go on forever. We would go straight to the horror section at the local video store and just pick videos we had never seen before.
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