Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead (2012)
This is a tough one to review as I’m not sure if my copy was more funny because of the Engrish subtitles. My subs were taken from German subs that were converted to English via Google Translate. Never a good thing normally, but for subtitles, it’s hilarious.
Normally I never watch the credits to a movie, but this one is pretty awesome. It has a fit Japanese chick gyrating to some funky music. When I say ‘gyrating’ it’s more like she has the runs and needs a dump. Still, she bends over a lot and that’s no bad thing for the start of a movie.
and this is just the intro!
Storyline. Yes, well… it’s something about a parasite, shit zombies (not shit as in bad, but shit as in poop), ass groping, and farting. Yes, that’s about it.
Now THAT’s what you call subtitles…
The movie begins with some school bullies and a sister who doesn’t save her sibling. Then we see her and some friends who are apparently going fishing for a special fish parasite that’ll make them super thin and be models.
No, seriously, I didn’t make that up.
The one chick with the big hooters downs the parasite then needs to take a serious dump (see image above). This results in much childish humour with bare ass and farts aplenty.
That was the best part of the whole film. You can move along now.
The one major downside of the film is that while she shows her bare ass to all the world, she doesn’t show her large hooters which is a travesty of justice. There is one topless (slightly lesbo) scene but the actress has nothing to show. I have bigger moobs than she has boobs. Very disappointing…
That’s it?! That’s all the boobs I get to see?!
So, after some zombies emerge from the shitter we find out that these are rather unique shit flinging zombies. Yes, they come equipped with pockets full of poop to toss at our witness wonders.
Blah blah, we later see more anally equipped zombies who chase our ‘heroes’ (for want of a better word) through a forest ass first:
Uh, I think you guys forgot to wipe…
With parasites dangling from their asses like alien haemorrhoids they pursue, and bump off, most of the cast leaving our heroine to fight it out alone.
Some topical ointment and I’m sure you’ll be find madam…
Our heroine eventually learns that it’s OK to fart in public and wins by using her new found super power.
No need to brag about it…
And that’s about it. It’s an OK movie to pass some time with but they really missed out big time with boobs. I’m very disappointed at them for passing on the chick with the big hooters yet sharing a flat chested schoolgirl with us. Poop chucking zombies were fun as was the innumerable fart sounds. Gore was OK, but a lot of it was CGI which sucks donkey balls.
Rating: 
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