Feast II – Sloppy Seconds

Feast II - Sloppy Seconds

Feast II - Sloppy Seconds

If you’ve seen the first Feast movie (or read my Feast review here on Midnight Showing) then you’ll know what the movie is about. For the rest of you, it’s about monsters invading a small town and running riot. Yep, that’s pretty much it. But it’s a comedy so when kills aren’t taking place, something funny is.

A couple of characters have made it from the first Feast in to this second outing. Sloppy Seconds starts exactly where the first movie left off, in fact it shows you the end of Feast then has the black screen with the shrinking circle, exactly like you’d see when you finish a level in Super Mario World (Super Nintendo/Famicom, best console ever created in the history of the Universe).

We’re introduced to Biker Queen then reintroduced to the Bartender (who still isn’t dead). We’re then treated to the meeting of Bartender and Honey Pie (deserter in Feast) which results in one of the best male to female beatings ever. Even just thinking about the sound of her head smashing off that toilet pan makes me snigger like a school boy.

The main problem with Sloppy Seconds is that it takes nearly half the film to introduce all the characters (which I think there are too many) and give a decent laugh. Even then, for me the first laugh was the monster fart scene. Call me immature if you like, but you can’t beat fart jokes. Then comes one of about three scenes that made me laugh: the monster bukkake scene.

That's monster wang and monster jizz!

That's monster wang and monster jizz!

One of the characters decides that to defeat the enemy, he must know the enemy – inside and out, so he decides to do an autopsy on one of the creatures. This involves him using a blow torch to cut open a monster and poke it’s various organs with a stick. One organ must obviously be the prostate which makes the monster shoot jizz over almost all the cast (including the old Bartender guy! Ewwww!).

The monsters REALLY love our earth cats...

The monsters REALLY love our earth cats...

Another scene has Honey Pie locked in a store, in a daze she dreams of love and sex (with what looks like some fat dude) but awakens to see one of the creatures humping something. Turns out, the monsters really love our earth cats…

There are a couple of other scenes which made me laugh out loud, but they were few and far between, especially since the movie does run for a touch over 90mins. The effects are quite well done (for a straight to DVD release that is) and there’s certainly enough gore in it to keep the average gore-hound grinning.

Gratuitous boobage.

Gratuitous boobage.

Unfortunately they kept the best scenes to near the end of the movie, which is where the punk/goth chicks finally get their boobs out. This should certainly have happened sooner and would have gotten more of a (boioioioing!) reaction with them running about topless. But sadly not to be. Shame you Mr Director!

So, in summing up: it gets a couple of points for the topless chicks, and a couple of points for the funny scenes (watch out for the baby scene), that still only makes it average.

But, never fear… there’s always next time. Yep, there’s a Feast III cumming.

NOTE TO DIRECTOR: more boobage early on please…

Rating: ★★★★☆


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About Ronnie

Having survived the UK's 'video nasty' (prohibition) era I'm eager to catch up with all previously unseen sleaze and filth. I revel in mixtape oddness, boobage, gore, and proper latex special effects, don't get me started on CGI... - email Ronnie
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